Sometimes you have to say no to some things. I’m learning (the older I get) of the importance of saying no. If I don’t say no, I find myself overcommitted and exhausted.
A few weeks ago I had to tell a few ladies in my church that I couldn’t help them make a video for an upcoming ladies event at my church. I hated so say no, but had to. A few days after that I got an idea for a new product that would be a huge help for children’s pastors who visit KidzMatter.com. I had to say no.
It’s easier now than ever for me to say no. Why? I learned a secret. Are you ready to hear it? Saying no doesn’t mean you’re saying never, it means you’re saying NOT RIGHT NOW. Will I ever be able to help the ladies in my church make a video? Yes, but now is not a good time. Will that new product ever find itself on the shelves of the KidzMatter store? Yes, but not right now.
The two two greatest words in the English language are yes and no. They each have the power to change your destiny. Ask God to give you the wisdom (and the courage) to say no at the right time.
My personality makes it easy to say “no” to things and I definitely see the value of saying “no” in order to say “yes” for the greater. But boy does it drive me nuts when God tells me “no” in order to say “yes” for the greater.
No is a powerful word and I definitely agree that people including and especially pastor’s need to tell people no. I used to say yes to everything and then all of a sudden I started saying no to everything. Now I have finally reached what I believe is a good balance. I try to say yes whenever I can, but their are times just like you Ryan that the answer must be no for right now, but it doesn’t mean it will be no forever.
Good word! I started reading a wonderful book about this that my friend Mark Harper gave me today “Boundaries” When to say yes, when to say no to take control of your life. by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend. So far it’s been amazing.
bj
people pleasers everywhere (and you know who you are) … can i get an amen?! preach it brother!
That is one area that I have to constantly work on. I’m better about “no” than I used to be but have had to train myself to say, “Let me think and pray about it first.”
I have found that one little two letter word absolutely liberating!
I’ve found the most important thing about saying “No” is being clear that I’m saying “No” to the request, not to the person. Early in my ministry I would say “No” and could offend someone, making them think I wouldn’t help because I didn’t value them. I had to learn how to say “No” while still showing I value the person and would be willing to help at a later time.